One Stone Gone!

I am in shock rather than elated!  I have managed to lose 14lbs, that is one whole stone!  I guess all the crabby might be worth it after all.  I have finally discovered the solution to the marvelous mystery of weight loss.  Eat less and do more!  Simples.  Now I just have to repeat the process another five times and I should be just about within the healthy weight range for my height.  Tut tut tut.  So easy to put on so hard to get off.  What I would give for a good old fashioned Pie Day Friday!  Tonight I had a crustless Quiche for my tea,  hmmm now could ya answer something for me. . . a crustless quiche is suspiciously identical to an omelette, what is the difference?  Quiche is a bit of a pie, so I am surely committing brain trickery upon myself by calling an omelette a 'Crustless Quiche'.  Who stole the pie bit of my quiche, making my quiche not a quiche but an omelette.  My brain is haddled due to the calorific deprivation it is enduring.
           Has anyone ever tried Weight Watchers bread?  Yesterday I nearly caused a fire again by trying to toast it for breakfast.  I popped it in the toaster as I would 'normal' bread, whizzed up to give the chickens breakfast and came back to black billowing smoke!  I tried again on the lowest toaster setting, nipped to pack Euan's school bag and came back to black billowing smoke.  I am going to take Weight Watchers Bread camping, I am gonna use it as tinder for starting the campfire!  Nothing ignites with the ease of Weight Watchers bread.  It is similar to Candy Floss in texture, you bite it and as if by magic it has vanished before you have a chance to chew and swallow.  Ingenious stuff.  Trying to make a sandwich with it is pretty futile too, a slice of cheese, lettuce, tomato, cucumber and mayo (low fat of course), you might as well just stick the filling in the palm of your hand and forget the bread because the bread disintegrates on impact with anything.  Spreading it is the best. . . the bread vanishes and you are left with a bundle of crumbs on your knife!  Yep I sure am enjoying all that this diet  healthy eating plan has to offer!
           We won't go in to Weight Watchers Coconut Cake. . . I think it should carry a health warning, cigarettes have got to be safer. . . Weight Watchers Coconut Cake must be a close cousin to Weight Watchers bread. . . it is incredibly chokesome!  Cake my a**e!  More brain trickery, I am quite old enough to know cake when I see it and I sure as eggs is eggs know what is not cake!
           No body seems to have noticed I have lost any weight yet and the only difference I have noticed so far is that I am having trouble with my knickers!  They are much more likely to fall down these days and when they are not falling down they are quite literally getting in a twist!  Shopping list for tomorrow:  New knickers or a pair of Braces!

Yep loving this diet plan and embracing all that it has to offer!